I was laying awake in bed thinking a couple nights ago (couldn’t sleep, heh) and for some reason I started wondering why some parents try to mold their children so much they don’t have a chance to just be themselves.  When I was in Grade 4, my dad though it would be a swell idea to have me start piano lessons.  Being only 9, I didn’t have much say in the matter.  He’s really into music but his career was computer programming and dare I say living vicariously through me? (I really hope my dad doesn’t somehow accidentally find this site, because of course he knows my first and middle name.)  Piano was really more his interest than mine.

Needless to say I absolutely hated it, and would actually cry all the way home from every lesson in the car.  I don’t have a real “explanation” for that, the teacher was not particularly mean or cruel or doing anything other than she was supposed to do - teach piano.  But I felt so, so out of place and so frustrated I despised it.  I also think I was putting a lot of undue pressure on myself for whatever reason, so when I failed to succeed at something immediately I was angry at myself.  Who knows the psychology really of a 9 year old. I remember once actually tearing up a little during the lesson, which stirred things up and my teacher was concerned as to why I was upset.  One thing led to the next and I eventually stopped taking piano lessons about half a year after I started.

Which was so relieving!  My parents played the “you’ve-let-me-down” card for a while but it eventually passed like most things do.  Looking back on the experience, piano just isn’t something I was, or am interested in and I think inducing feelings of guilt or scorn just because I didn’t want to do what was I was “supposed” to do, is just plain wrong.  I really do believe that parents shouldn’t force their children into something they’re just not interested in, or be annoyed or mad at them for that.  Kids find their niche eventually, whether it’s something the parents want or not.  And you really should be able to love what you love and not like what you don’t like.
And that’s the story and my 2 cents.